Monday, January 7, 2008

THE CURMUDGEON CHRONICLE - #230

THE CURMUDGEON CHRONICLE ©

AN IRREVERENT VIEW


Time Line: January 6, 2008
Date Line: Flemington New Jersey

Debate (v): To discuss something in depth, presenting arguments to prove or disprove a proposition.

Last night, 10 aspirants for the Presidency were supposed to debate. The Chronicle refuses to handicap the results of this year’s election on the basis of their performances.

The Republican hopefuls led off.

If a Debate consisted of self aggrandizement and not-so-subtle innuendo, Governor Romney took the Gold.

If the outcome of a debate is determined by the winner of every war ever fought during his lifetime, Senator McCain gets the nod.

The Production Department voted to cast Fred Thompson in a sitcom featuring a crusty, loveable judge, but turned him down for the lead in “Ronnie Rides Again”
Congressman Ron Paul debated in absentia with the Democrats, winning the “Voice in the Wilderness” award from the Republicans.

If bragging and false claims decided debates, Hizzonor Rudy G. would take the cupcake home. We hope the Times will not have to retell the truth about a high-handed, disaffected and disliked Mayor. The claim that he saved NYC on 9/11 is silly.

No Republican dared to debate Governor Huckabee’s allegation that freedoms come from God. The concept is debatable; just ask any slave or sufferer under the heel of tyranny. The Reverend, unchallenged, won the Obfuscation Award.

The Republican “debate session” was a beauty contest devoid of beauty.

The Democrats took the stage and the Chronicle believes:

If a debate were a contest to see how often you could restate your Curriculum Vitae, Governor Richardson would be the winner of The Biggest Bore Prize.

John Edwards in his junkyard dog mode adopted the Obama “change” platform and was gracious enough to share it with the Illinois Senator, while: a) eliminating any possibility that change under Obama would be worth anything, and b) claiming that Senator Clinton knew only what she learned in Kindergarten and couldn’t change a light-bulb. Clinton said she was as guilty of change as anyone, and maybe more so.
Senator Clinton was prepared to protect herself from the onslaught of her opponents but never got the chance. No one wanted to talk to a “status quo” candidate, much less have a debate with one.

Senator Obama was impressive. He has very limited managerial or foreign policy experience and only one partial term in Washington under his belt. However, he has found a dual role as prescient savant in military matters, and St. George the dragon-slayer. If he pulls Excalibur out of the Primary Stonewall, Democrats can proceed to the election with confidence.

There were no issues debated. Everyone on the Democratic side wants the same things: Improved social services for all (healthcare, education, social security, etc,); an end to war in Iraq; a better fiscal approach (i.e., a change in the tax rates); resumption of relationships with our historic allies, and recovery of the freedoms we lost in the last seven years.

The Republicans certainly did not debate. They agree that they must defend: Bush, Iraq, the current fiscal policy, and rely on “social issues” if they are to win. Huckabee and Paul are not cast in the Republican mold devised by Karl Rove. Neither of them has a hope of Republican organizational support, regardless of how much money they raise or the number of polls they win.

The choice is with us. This election is not a Personality Pageant. It is the time we choose the person to whom we surrender control of our future. Regardless of likeability, we must elect a person who believes in our Constitution and is dedicated to assuring citizens the freedom, protection, and even-handed treatment defined in that document.

We failed in our choice twice in the last eight years because we were taught that picking a President is like choosing a drinking buddy. We did that; got a hopeless War, and are nearly bankrupt. We cannot afford another mistake.

Howard Stamer

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